Wednesday 23 February 2011

Standing 6 feet from the edge..& im thinking..

My first post on this blog....
& so is it the beginning...............?

Beginning of a something new..Beginning of a metamorphosis i have been waiting for..
Beginning of my new life........& the beginning of me...

Today I feel like sharing my life..
I have lived a normal plain life of a simple yet overly-ambitious life of a delhi girl for the past 20yrs..(Yes thats how old I am!)
And in these years I have learnt to live on the edge..
I have learnt how life goes on..I've learnt how you have no option but to get up  fight again after every great fall..I've learnt to live alone in the emptiness of crowds..
Learnt a bit too much..

As a child I had been very ambitious,, Trying to fight my way to the top always..
Many a times i fell but without a second a moment of thought I was back again on the track each time with a broken little heart but a yet new vigour..
Things were never that easy at any point in time..I had to fight my way to things..
I loved to be loved............

But as I grew...the lessons of life grew way too harsh for me to stand up again each time with a new spirit  hope...The lessons which pushed me down under..The lessons grew too fierce for me to face........
& thus here I am 6 feet from the edge with 100 parts of me hovering over m head..with no direction to follow..with just me waiting for the metamorphosis to happen.
Waiting to pick every part of me  put me back together to being who i was..
Waiting to get myself back again..bcz right now im all lost & alone..not able to look ahead with these tears blurring my vision..

The past 4yrs changed every part of me,, inside out..
The experiences of the past 4 yrs drenched out every single strength from within my spirit, strained my head way too much 7 left me numb with just a single realization...I'VE LOST MYSELF..

However today is not just a starting of this blog for me but a whole new start of a new life too..
I wish to redefine my life, I wish to ake charge..
I wish to FIGHT...........I WISH TO BE ME...
I hope god is still with me & that he would help me through this metamorphosis..



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